Can't fight this feeling
by Lois872
Summary: Dean/OFC. Dean and Nicki have a history together which ended just as he left for Stanford. Two years later she is back in his life..


***DISCLAIMER: This is an episode re-write, therefore I DO NOT OWN anything but Nicki (fictional character I made up). Enjoy!***

**Nicki's POV**

I couldn't help but smile as I spotted the "Welcome to South Dakota" sign. I had spent the past year on the road hunting down every evil SOB I could get my hands on and I was in desperate need of a break.

No place like home, right? I sighed with relief as the double cast iron gates to the pathway leading to my two storey home slowly opened. A variety of plants including boxwood, betony, angelica and dandelions surrounded the boundaries of my property. All plants had been strategically chosen, not because of their looks but due to their protective and evil repelling properties. My home had been in my family for generations and which each generation passing, more measures had been added to ensure that no demon or other evil entity would be able to enter.

I parked my black 1967 Chevrolet Camaro SS in its usual spot and grabbed the two duffle bags off the back seat. Throwing my bags onto the hallway floor, I made a bee line for my bathroom. Leaning onto my sink, I took a long hard look in the mirror. The past year had visibly taken its toll on my body and soul. A year of endless hours on the road, never staying in one place for more than a few days and one hunt after the next. My complexion was pale which further accentuated the dark circles under my eyes and the bruise on my jaw from my latest hunt. I changed into my pyjamas and as soon my head hit the pillows of my dearly missed bed, I was dead to the world.

I woke up the next morning, to be precise it was nearly noon, and took a long shower. As I entered my living room, the flashing red light of my answering machine, indicating a new voicemail, caught the corner of my eye. I pressed the button to listen to it.

"Nicki, it's me." It felt like ages since I last heard this voice, but regardless, I recognised it in a heartbeat. The voice belonged to none other than John Winchester. "I called this number knowing that it would buy me some time. You're going to hate me for what I'm about to do but I have no other choice. Maybe one day, you'll understand why I did it." He paused for moment. "Please look after my boys." And with this, the beep tone signalled the end of the message.

"God damn it!" I cursed and frantically dialled John's number which I then discovered had been disconnected. I was about to slam my phone against the wall in frustration, when Ellen Harvelle's caller ID popped up on the screen.

"Hey Ellen, what's up?" I greeted her, trying hard to hide my frustration and worry.

"Sweetie, are you okay?" Damn it, she's on to me now.

"I'm okay." I don't even know why I tried to bullshit a woman that had a sixth sense for detecting BS.

"No, you're not. Cmon, spill the beans." She demanded.

"It's John.." I paused. "He left me some cryptic message two weeks ago on my answer phone and I can't get a hold of him because he disconnected his stupid phone."

"I left him a message a few months back as I think I found a lead on the demon but he never got back to me."

Now I got really worried. "This is so unlike him, he would jump at any remote lead on the demon."

"Exactly." Ellen confirmed. "Why don't you swing by the roadhouse and check it out for yourself? Besides, its been too long since you last visited."

That was actually a good idea as it would allow me to check out the lead and have Ash help me track down John. "Sounds like a plan. I'll leave asap, so I will see you tomorrow."

"Drive safe, sweetie." And with this I hung up.

In record time I cleaned and reloaded my weapons and packed my bags and before I knew it, I was sat behind the steering wheel of my beloved Camaro again , this time Wisconsin bound.

The next day I arrived at Harvelle's Roadhouse. The parking lot was pretty much empty, apart from an old beat up van which I figured likely belonged to Ash.

**General POV. Harvelle's Roadhouse. Set in episode "Everybody loves a clown"**

"Sam and Dean.. Winchester?" Ellen muttered whilst both her and Jo kept their guns pointed at Sam and Dean who still had their hands raised in surrender. "Son of a bitch!"

"Mom, do you know these guys?" Jo asked.

"Yea, I think these are John Winchester's boys." Ellen laughed. "Hey, I'm Ellen." Both her and Jo lowered their guns. "And that's my daugher Jo."

"Hey" Jo greeted them unethusiastically.

"You're not going to hit me again?" Dean asked.

"No, but I might." A third female voice chimed up from behind the bar. Dean swallowed hard and redirected his gaze towards the source of the voice that was audibly pissed off and all too familiar to him.

And there she was, looking as gorgeous as ever in a pair of tight jeans that were riding low on her hips and a white tank top that showed off an inch of her tanned midriff.

Sam had never seen his brother looked so spooked before as he did when he spotted the pretty petite brunette , who was standing behind the bar of Harvelle's roadhouse with her arms crossed and her piercing emerald eyes focused on Dean.

The girl in question stood at approximately 5'4 and was blessed with curves in all the right places as his brother would say. She had loose dark auburn curls framing her gorgeous sun kissed face, which was made even more striking by her pouty red lips and the long curled lashes framing her emerald green eyes..

He looked back and forth between the two of them and it was evident to Sam that his brother and the beautiful stranger had a history which was beyond a simple one night stand. Sam could have sworn that he saw hurt behind his brothers' eyes for a second. For some reason she seemed somewhat familiar to Sam, despite being certain he had never met her before, and that's when it him. A few months back, he had opened the glove compartment of the impala and found a picture of Dean and her looking obviously loved up. When Sam had questioned his brother about it, he had immediately shut him down and they hadn't spoken about it again.

Ellen put an end to the awkward silence. "How about a drink? We've got business to discuss."

"You're right, Ellen." Nicki agreed and approached the elder Harvelle who engulfed her in a warm hug. She then turned towards Jo, who she also hugged. "Good to see you Jo."

"Glad you're here honey." Ellen smiled.

The Winchesters and Nicki sat down by the bar whilst the Harvelles disappeared behind it to gather some drinks.

"So, you must be Sammy." Nicki smiled at the younger Winchester who returned the smile and extended his hand which she shook. "I'm Nicki."

"What are you doing here?" Dean blurted out and he regretted doing so as soon as the words crossed his lips.

"Back at you."

The Harvelles reappeared with beers and whiskey in hand and joined the group by the bar. Ellen handed Dean a small towel filled with ice for his head.

"You called our Dad, said you could help. Help with what?" Dean went straight to the point.

"Well, the demon of course. I heard he was closing in on it." Ellen responded.

"What? Was there an article in the Demon Hunters Quaterly that I missed? I mean, who, who are you? How do you know about all this?"

"Hey, I just run a saloon. But hunters have been known to pass through now and again including your Dad a long time ago. John was like family once."

"Oh yeah? How come he never mentioned you before" Dean demanded from Ellen before he looked at Nicki. "How come you never mentioned the roadhouse before?"

"You'd have to ask him that." Ellen responded.

"Speaking of your Dad, where is he? He left me some cryptic message about two weeks ago and worried me sick." Nicki chimed in.

"So why exactly do we need your help?" Dean demanded from Ellen and ignored Nicki.

"Hey, don't do me any favours. Look, if you don't want my help, fine. Don't let the door smack your ass on the way out. But John wouldn't have sent you if..."

Ellen paused and both her and Nicki exchanged worried looks.

"He didn't send you." Nicki concluded. "He's alright, isn't he?"

Dean looked over to Sam. "No. No, he isn't. It was the demon, we think. It, um, it just got him before he got it, I guess."

"I am so sorry." Nicki and Ellen said in unison.

"It's okay. We're alright."

Nicki could tell straight away that they were far from being okay and all she wanted to do at this moment was take Dean into her arms.

"Really? I know how close you and your Dad were."

"Really lady, I'm fine."

Sam intervened. "So look, if you can help, we could use all the help we can get."

"Well, we can't but Ash will."

"Ash!" Nicki rolled her eyes as she knew to well what was awaiting her.

The man passed out on the pool table jerked awake and sat up flailing."What? Nicki my love, is that you?"

"That's Ash?" Sam asked.

"Mm-hmm. Jo responded.

"He's a genius." Nicki added.

"You flatter me." Ash sat down next to Nicki and gave her a smirk. "So, word on the street is that you and your lover boy Alec broke up as you realised that I am truly the love of your life?"

"Just drop it, Ash." Nicki did not think she could roll her eyes any harder.

"You've gotta be kidding me, this guy's no genius. He's a Lynyrd Skynyrd roadie." Dean interrupted and slapped a brown folder down on the table.

Ash smirked again. "I like you."

"Just give him a chance." Jo urged.

Dean opened the folder. "All right. This stuff's about a year worth of our dad's work, so uh, let's see what you make of it."

Ash started rifling through the folder, pulling out random papers in the process and shaking his head as he scanned through them. "Cmon, this crap ain't real. There ain't nobody who can track a demon like this."

"John could." Nicki added which just raised so many more questions in Sam. He had never met her before, yet she seemed so close to his father and brother. He couldn't help but wonder what their story was.

"There are non-parametrics, statistical overviews, prospects and correlations. I mean.. damn! They're signs. Omens. Uh, if you can track 'em, you can track this demon. You know, like crop failures, electrical storms.. You ever been struck by lightening? It ain't fun."

"Can you track it or not?" Sam challenged.

"Yeah, with this, I think so. But it's gonna take time, uh, give me... fifty one hours." Ash gathered the contents of the folder and stood up. He turned towards Nicki. "I'll see you later my love." He blew her a kiss and headed towards his room at the back of the bar.

"Hey man" Dean called after him.

"Yeah?" Ash turned to face him.

"I, uh, I dig the haircut"

Ash smiled like a cheshire cat. "All business up front, all party in the back.

**Nicki's POV**

I rolled my eyes as Ash disappeared into his room and then turned my attention back to the Winchesters. Dean was shamelessly checking out Jo, who in turn returned his advances by flirting back. Dean got up from his seat and eventually followed her to the other end of the bar whilst Sam and I stayed behind at the bar.

"So Nicki, how do you know my Dad and Dean?" Sam asked.

"My Dad and I had been on a hunt a few years back when we stumbled upon John and Dean who happened to be on the same hunt. I think that at that time, you had just taken off to go back to school." Nicki explained. "My Dad died a year after our first meeting, which left me hunting on my own."

"I am so sorry"

"Thank you." Nicki mustered up a sad smile at the unpleasant memory of her father's death. "Dean and I would occasionally hunt together whilst your Dad went out on his own." She paused. "Last time I saw your brother, he was leaving to go get you at Stanford."

I could tell that Sam had a million more question but he knew too well that it wasn't the right time to ask. "Well, it is nice to meet you."

"Same. I heard so many good things about you." I smiled when I caught a folder next to the police scanner.

Sam appeared to have spotted the same. "Hey Ellen, what is that?"

"It's a police scanner. We keep tabs on things, we.."

"No, no, the, uhm, the folder."

"Oh yea, I was going to give this to you Nicki." She handed me the file which contained several newspaper clippings about couples being murdered in the area and their children being left behind."

**General POV**

Dean was trying hard to keep himself busy by flirting with Jo, who by all means was very attractive, however he could not help himself but steal glances at Nicki who was talking to his brother and for some reason it made him jealous. What further added to his jealousy was this Alec guy Ash had mentioned.

_Damn it, Dean. Get a grip. It's been over two years. You moved on and she clearly has too._ He thought before trying to focus his attention back on Jo.

"Yeah. So. I guess I've got fifty one hours to waste. Maybe tonight we should, uh.." Dean looked up at Jo before glancing back at Nicki who was now looking through a file with Sam. "No, you know what? Never mind."

Jo cocked an eyebrow at him. "What?"

"Nothing, just, uh, wrong place, wrong time."

"You know, I thought you were gonna toss me some cheap pick up line." Dean chuckled slightly embarrassed at that remark. " Most hunters come through that door thinking they can get in my pants with some... pizza, a six pack and side of Zeppeling IV.

"Well, what a bunch of scumbags."

Jo smirked. "Not you."

"I guess not."

**Nicki's POV**

"Dean, come here, check this out!" Sam called over whilst I was frantically shaking my head no as I knew what this was going to lead to.

Dean casually strolled over to us. "Yeah?"

"Ellen's found Nicki a hunt. Few murders not too far away."

"I better be on my way to check it out." I grabbed the folder from Sam's hands and got up from my chair ready to say my goodbyes. "Ellen, Jo, I'm off! I'll drop by on my way home when I've finished the case."

"Bye Nicki!"

"Dean." I briefly gave him a nod and then smiled at Sam. "It was nice meeting you Sam."

"Hang on, Nicki." He looked at me with big puppy dog eyes. "Dean and I could help you? Seeing as we're stuck here by the looks of it for another 51 hours."

"I' m sure, you'll find other ways of keeping yourselves busy." I remarked sarcastically at Dean.

"Sam, you're right." Dean cocked an eyebrow at me. "For old time's sake Nicki."

"Fine." I sighed. "Just let me make one thing clear, this is my hunt so I get to call the shots." And with that we exited the roadhouse.

We got to the parking lot and the boys were headed towards the beat up van.

"That's your ride?" My eyes somewhat widened in disbelief.

Dean looked visibly embarrassed. "The impala's out of commission at the moment."

"My car it is then because there is no way I am getting into that stoner van." I looked over to Sam. "Sam, you get to ride shotgun." Dean was about to retort but I stopped him with a glare. "My car, my rules. Also driver picks the music and shotgun as well as backseat shut their cake holes."

**General POV.**

Sam and Nicki had been chatting away for the last hour and if Dean didn't know any better, he would have sworn that they had been best friends for years. He couldn't help himself but steal an occasional glance at her, after all she had been the first woman he had been really serious about and could have pictured himself having a future with. Not only was she drop dead gorgeous from the outside but she also had the personality to match.

Dean felt a little bit jealous when she started laughing at a funny story Sam had told. The last emotion he had managed to evoke in her was the polar opposite. The image of her crying and looking at him with pure hurt was something he had tried to forget for years but to no avail.

Nicki put in a new cassette tape and the song that started playing made her smile. "I love this song!" She turned the volume up and started to sing along. "Well I'm hot blooded, check it and see. I've got a fever of 103. Come on baby, do you do more than dance? I'm hot blooded, I'm hot blooded." She looked over at Sam who just looked absolutely clueless. "I like you and all Sam, but god, your taste in music sucks if you don't know this classic!" She smiled at him and then proceeded to sing along again whilst tapping her fingers on the steering wheel.

Sam couldn' help himself but return the smile. He could see why Dean had fallen for her, there were a lot of similarities such as their love for muscle cars and mullet rock but in so many ways the two of them couldn't have been more different.

Sam shot Dean a glance through the rearview mirror as his brother had been awfully quiet. His older brother was busy watching the pretty brunette in the drivers seat speed down the freeway whilst singing along to Foreigner's hot blooded. The younger Winchester cocked an eyebrow at his older brother when he realised he had been caught staring at Nicki.

"We're here." Nicki announced as Sam was thinking about making some remark towards Dean.

_Saved by the bell. _Dean thought.

**Nicki's POV**

We finally arrived at Cooper Carnival and after Dean has spotted a "Help Wanted" sign, we decided to pose as applicants.

Entering the tent, we spotted an elderly man throwing knives at a target. Dean approached him and Sam and I followed suit.

"Excuse me, we're looking for Mr Cooper. Have you seen him around?"

The older man turned around, removed his sunglasses to reveal blueish white eyes. He was clearly blind. "Is that supposed to be some kind of joke?"

Sam and I couldn't help ourselves but exchange bemused looks as we watched the horror in Dean's eyes. "Oh god, I'm so sorry."

"You think I wouldn't give my eyeteeth to see Mr Cooper or a sunset or anything at all?"

Dean looked at us pleadingly. "Wanna give me a little help here?"

"Not really." Sam replied, still amused at the scene unfolding in front of us.

"Hey Barry, is there a problem?" We all turned around to discover that the voice belonged to a very short guy dressed in a ridiculous costume.

"Yea, this guy hates blind people." Barry, the blind dude, responded.

"What?" Dean protested. "No, I don't."

"Hey buddy, what the hell is your problem?" The short guy demanded angrily.

Dean grew more embarrassed by the minute. "Nothing, it's just a little misunderstanding."

_Oh my god, he didn't just say that..._ I thought.

"Little? You son of a bitch!" The short dude raised the metal baton he was holding and looked like he was making a beeline for Dean.

"Hey, hey, hey." I stepped in between him and Dean. "I'm really sorry but my boyfriend is not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed. He hasn't exactly mastered the art of thinking before speaking." I batted my eyelashes at the short dude and gave him the cheesiest smile I could muster up, which caused him to visibly calm down. "Now, could you please tell us where we could find Mr Cooper?"

The short guy smiled back at me, but as he looked at Dean his smile turned into a glare. "You better teach him some manners."

I took a step back to stand next to Dean and put my arm around him. "I sure will."

Barry sighed. "Mr Cooper is probably in his trailer.

"Thank you gentlemen." I flashed another smile and grabbed Dean's hand to drag him away hastily. Sam followed close behind. As soon as we turned a corner, I let go of Dean's hand and turned towards him. "Real smooth, Dean."


End file.
